It’s the time of year when families all over the country are getting together once again. We look to give thanks and enjoy the year’s harvest as well as each others’ company. In honor of Thanksgiving, we are exploring gratitude this week at Barn Life Recovery. With this in our minds, we turn once again to one of our favorites, David Whyte. Some of you may remember Mr. Whyte from a blog we did on disappointment back in March or so. Here are his thoughts on gratitude from his book, Consolations. We hope you enjoy them.
An A Priori State of Attention
Whyte writes: “Gratitude is not a passive response to something we have been given, gratitude arises from paying attention, from being awake in the presence of everything that lives within and without us. [It] is not necessarily something that is shown after the event, it is the deep, a priori state of attention that shows we understand and are equal to the gifted nature of life.”
He adds that “[g]ratitude is the understanding that many millions of things come together and live together and mesh together and breathe together in order for us to take even one more breath of air, that the underlying gift of life and incarnation as a living participating human being is privilege; that we are miraculously part of something rather than nothing. Even if that something is temporarily pain or despair, we inhabit a living world, with real faces, real voices, laughter, the color blue, the green of fields, the freshness of a cold wind, or the tawny hue of a winter landscape.”
The Full Miraculous Essenitality
He continues: “To see the full miraculous essentiality of the color blue is to be grateful with no necessity for a word of thanks”. Whyte is talking about experiencing the essence of something here without adding our own baggage or preconceptions. “To see fully, the beauty of a daughter’s face is to be fully grateful without having to seek a God to thank him. To sit among friends and strangers, hearing many voices, strange opinions,” he expands here to promote connection. Whyte goes on, “to intuit inner lives beneath surface lives, to inhabit many worlds at once in this world, to be a someone amongst all other someone’s, and therefore to make a conversation without saying a word, is to deepen our sense of presence and therefore our natural sense of thankfulness that everything happens both with us and without us, that we are participants and witness all at once.”
Participation and Witness
“Thankfulness finds its full measure in generosity of presence, both through participation and witness. We sit at the table as part of every other person’s world while making our own world without will or effort, this is what Is extraordinary and gifted, this is the essence of gratefulness, seeing to the heart of privilege. Thanksgiving happens when our sense of presence meets all other presences. Being unappreciative might mean we are simply not paying attention.”
Barn Life Recovery would like to wish all of you a Happy Thanksgiving. If you or someone you love is struggling with mental health issues, please don’t hesitate to give us a call today. Whether it’s depression, anxiety, or just overwhelming feelings, Barn Life is here for you. We have been where you are now and we’re ready to help. Our staff is standing by to guide you through the admissions process and help you with any questions. It’s not too late to love life again!
The ability to change with an ever-changing world is an innate ability that we sometimes forget to cultivate. It’s easy to be all “zen” when everything is going right. But life happens and situations arise. Going with the flow of the world is not always easy. To add a wrinkle, when do we hunker down and hold on? To go a step forward, when is the right time to surrender and retreat. Control, adaptation, and surrender are all different approaches. Knowing the difference between what WE CAN change externally and what WE NEED to change internally can be vexing. When is force the answer and when is adaptation the answer? When is retreat the answer? Tales, legends and myths are lenses in which we can examine these moments in life when we must decide between adapting, retreating or holding to the center.
Practice and Awareness
Most successful species have an uncanny knack for adaptation. It is, after all, the very reason they’re successful. However, as human beings with the capacity for self-awareness, we needn’t rely on innate talent. The ability to merge with the occasional chaos of life and ride it out like a rogue wave is a skill that can be cultivated. However, it does require practice and awareness. With many things in life, maybe we try to apply our will at first only to learn that an adaptive perspective may be needed. So we switch tactics. This happens often. And that is perfectly fine. It’s a process.
Adaptation, Retreat, and Control
This week let’s explore real-life situations where we can apply control, adaptation, or retreat and observe the results. We are showing our clients everyday examples of adaptation, retreat, and control. We can also pull from mythology many examples of this struggle between grasping (control) and letting go (surrender) and adaptation (change). How many can you think of?
Barn Life Recovery is the first treatment center in the state of California with a license to treat mental illness on an outpatient community-based level. At our holistic facility in Orange County, our Barn Life staff, within an idyllic setting, encourage tried and true healing practices vis-a-vis Tai Chi, synthetic-free psychology, relapse prevention, martial arts, and meditation through our Orange County intensive outpatient program and day program. If you or someone you know is struggling with anxiety, depression, or other mental health issues, give us a call today and start to love life again!
This week we’d like to take some time to examine joy and sorrow. These two feelings seem to lie on either end of the emotional spectrum. They go by other names, too: manic depression, bipolar disorder, or the downplayed colloquialism, ups and downs. We all have joyous days and sorrowful days but if we oscillate between joy and sorrow too quickly and too often, it is often considered an issue. An issue that has a special name and medical code. An issue to be considered. But how?
A Badge of (Dubious) Honor
Joy is easy to experience. So is the mania for the most part. “Busy, busy, busy” is almost a badge of honor in this culture. To not be busy would imply laziness or disinterest. Ask someone how they are doing today and you will more often than not hear the breathless reply, “busy!” This is either a polite way to say that chit-chatting with me is a waste of your time or you want me to know you are an ambitious, go-getter. Either way, I think I’ll pass. High time we embraced depression and sadness, and those languid, lovely summer afternoons with nothing to do.
An Opportunity to Learn
I often think about how Lao Tzu would respond to the question, “How are you today?” Likely by pointing to the spot in the sky where the moon will soon be. Or perhaps he would give a ubiquitous “Oh fair to middlin’!” He most certainly would not say “busy busy busy.” Alas, we digress and wander off the path. Folks generally have no issue with manically joyous behaviors and feelings. It is the polar opposite that troubles them. However, is anything truly gained or discovered when we are happy? To be honest, depression and sorrow have taught me more about myself, compassion, and the suffering of others far more than joy has revealed. Being present at the moment with joy is as easy as falling off a log. Takes no effort at all. But sadness? Yikes, that is brutal. Being sad immediately makes one think “I need to stop being sad!”. Alas, rejecting the present moment, with all its clues and cries, is unwise.
The Human Condition
The math is simple. High highs = low lows. Higher highs = lower lows. At some point, you have to ask yourself, “Do I want to ride the carousel or the roller coaster?” This week we will delve into our passions and depressions. The heat of joy and the cold chill of depression. We will practice being present and engaged with both. Feeling intense emotions is not a sickness or mental disorder. It is the human condition. Avoiding our intense emotions or worse, editing them, IS a mental disorder.
Barn Life Recovery is the first treatment center in the state of California with a license to treat mental illness on an outpatient community-based level. We specialize in mild to moderately severe mental illness, co-occurring disorders and addiction. If you’re feeling anxious, depressed, or just plain overwhelmed, please give us a call today and start loving life again!
Have you ever thought, I would like to be a little less crazy? Or, I would like to be a little more tolerant of ignorance. How about, I would like to stop drinking so much. Or, I wish I could make better choices so I could live a life I love instead of this inherited life that has me at the end of my rope. Why is it so damn hard to make these desires a reality? What is stopping us? The desire for transformation to improve one’s future seems a common drive for most people. Removing shortcomings and replacing them with our visions for a better future and a better self. To become something. Something more! Yet, despite these desires, here we sit, the same as always. We may think, all I have is this broken-down body and a mind that is as stubborn as a bull.
Manifesting Real Transformation
How can I manifest real transformation? Maybe we have a genetic predisposition to drink too much. Maybe we were just born crazy and no matter what we do, the same nonsense happens to us. Or maybe I was abused and do not know how to form close bonds to others. How do I change that? How does one transform oneself into something else? Lean in close. It begins with thoughts. Yes, that is correct. Thoughts. They cost nothing. They are yours for the taking, require little training and are highly suggestible. Thoughts shape everything around you and give form to ideas. Put simply, thoughts make stuff real. But how? Recent scientific study into the human genome in the past 20 years has revealed something astonishing. We can alter our genes with our minds. Did you hear what you just read? We can alter our genes with our minds!
Mind Over Matter
Ok, so what are genes again? Genes are the blueprints you inherited from your parents. Until recently, science suggested that you are stuck with whatever you get. However, this is incorrect. Even if you are “genetically predispositioned” for this and that, you can change all that by thinking. Not only that, but you can change it remarkably fast. Our minds and how we direct our minds can unlock genetic sequences we cannot even comprehend, yet. Research has proven the placebo effect. People with cancer or other afflictions think they received a cure even though in truth they have not. However, because of their strong conviction and belief, they cure themselves. People who walk on fire and do not burn. People who lift up cars to save children trapped underneath nd those who handle poisonous snakes and get bit yet do not die. These are astonishing examples of mind over matter.
A New Form of Genetics
Epigenetics is one way to view this process of transformation. This is a new form of genetics where we focus on altering genes through our thoughts and environment. Genes determine so much. But those genes only know what to do because you direct them. When you decide you are worthless and do not deserve happiness, some genes turn on and some genes turn off. As a result, all the proteins and building blocks for worthlessness and depression are produced. If you believe you are fat and will always be fat, certain genes are alerted and make that reality so. However, it works to your advantage as well. Using nothing more than thoughts, you can tell your genes exactly what you want. We conjure our lives from thought and our genetics respond making all that we think…a reality.
Transformation is a process of changing something. This week let’s identify what we want to change about ourselves. One or two things. Start small. By week’s end, we will see how much we have altered our genetic code. The proof will be in the quality of the reality we make for ourselves.
Barn Life Recovery is the first treatment center in the state of California licensed to treat mental illness on an outpatient community-based level. If you are feeling anxious, depressed, or just plain overwhelmed, give us a call today to speak with one of our admissions specialists.
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